Bonds
by Kotori Yui
Summary: AU story! They are connected to each other by an invisible chain, even if they wanted to broke it they couldn't. Why do they have to love each other? It's a sin. They know... They know it very well, however their feelings are stronger than themselves.
1. Chapter - I

**Hey, Hey everybody =D! This is my new story about RenMasa and the rest of the group haha xD**

**I'll publish one chap per week because I already have one more chap written, I only have to bother Scarlotte O'Hara (my dear beta) to correct it. (by the way, this chap is beta'ed by her - Scarlotte O'Hara ^^)**

**WARNING! The theme of this story is INCEST if you don't like don't bother to read it okidoki? Thank you (':**

**Then, enjoy!**

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**Bonds**

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**Chapter ~ I**

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"_I had to clench my fists and hurt myself to control this strong will. This strong desire. It's always the same. When I feel him so close, my heart pounds, my body shakes and starts to sweat. My blood boils. This is wrong. It's a sin. I know. I know, but…_

_Our blood… We have the same blood, but my blood reacts __to __him. His entire presence. His entire being. I want him. I want to do so much to him. I want to pull him and hold him tightly. I want to kiss his soft and tempting pink lips in a fierce way, raping his mouth with my tongue feeling his own against mine mixing our flavors and warmth. Then, I want to travel all over his pale and irresistible body with my fingertips… My hands… My mouth… My tongue… I want to bite and suck his small pink nipples, harshly until they are red, then I want to lick them softly and make his body shiver with all the pleasure he feels. After that, I want to move my hands __to__his horny member and look into his blue eyes to see how __much_ _lust he feels for me, for my body. Only after, I want to __take_ _his hot erection, lightly bathed with some pre-cum, in my mouth and with that, feel his soft body being_ _arched_. _Then__ with one of my hands I will push it harder and this way_ _I will feel __all of his hot length inside of my lustful mouth, providing him uncontrollabl__e_ _pleasure_._When he __is__ already at his limit, I would remove my mouth from his wet hot member to torture __his __desire a little more__. His moans and whimpers totally uncontrolled… His low voice calling my name over and over again._

"_Ren… Ren… Ren…"_

_Smiling gently, I would kiss him while one of my hands __would stroke __his hard member very slowly__, and when I felt my fingers totally wet with his pre-cum, I would introduce them one by one very softly inside of his hot and tempting entrance, scissoring them quickly and __fiercely__. His mouth would __break__ the tender kiss to drop gasps and moans one more time due to all the vibrations throughout his bones, spine, tendons... Throughout his entire body._

_After all the movements with my fingers, I would finally reach his special sweet spot and he would twitch his body and strongly groan unable to stop. Oh yes, that means he would be ready for me; for my strong desire __to__ monopolize all his being and everything that surrounds him. He would be mine. Then, very slowly I would pull out my wet fingers and push my hot horny member inside of his warm entrance feeling his body reacting to my love and showing me his love, absorbing and tightening __around__ my erection making me able to feel his addictive heat._

"_Ah! Finally we are one… You are mine, Masa-niisan" I would say, intertwining our fingers feeling our warmth and he would groan louder feeling my gentle gesture and hearing that name__.__ Because both things are the proof of our sin and only knowing that would drive us to our climax, leaving all the exciting sensations __to__ run all __through__ our bodies contracting them to expel all the lust out with one last and loud moan. __Both of us calling out each other's names. __This is what I always think when I see him. No, today is different… Today my thoughts, my desire are stronger than usual. It's his fault. Tsk!"_

Ren's serious expression disappeared only to be replaced by a provocative one. His lips were curved into a smirk and he finally purred some words from deep within his throat.

"That's not good Masa-niisan, you shouldn't walk around the house like that. Look…" The blond said and walked toward the blue haired man softly touching on his chest covered with a few drops of water which gave him a gorgeous slight glow. Masato had only a small towel around his hips. His body was still wet because of the previous bath he had and Ren could feel a strong sweet scent coming from him. It was so appetizing.

"_Oh shit! He is so soft, so beautiful… Why he can't be mine? To the hell with blood relationships! What if he is my brother? I don't care, the only thing I want his him. His body. But __e__specially his heart. Shit! Why __does__ my heart __love__ him so much?"_ Ren stopped the touch and looking away said "You will catch a cold, be careful."

He knew that being in love with his own brother wasn't right, and even if he tried with all his might to forget about his feelings he couldn't because his body automatically started to react to his brother's. Masato couldn't imagine the great effort that he had to do to control his desire, his love. The blond had turned into a playboy just to forget about his brother, yet when he was fucking some girl the body he saw right before him was his brother's, that's why he could always reach his moment of ecstasy with a girl. His brother didn't know how hard everything was.

Even so, what Ren didn't know was how much his lovely older brother loved him too. Masato's body also reacted to his younger brother's. The perfect carved muscles, the slight tanned skin, the irresistible pink lips that seemed to be soft to the touch, the beautiful and shiny light blue eyes, the long blond hair… Every inch of his brother's body drove the blue haired teen completely crazy. Whenever he felt Ren's body near his, a static shiver traveled over his spine reaching his heart making it pound strongly and intensely. Oh, how he wanted to touch and be touched by Ren and lose himself to his heat and softness. How he wanted to mix their scents in one by intertwining their bodies. How he wanted to be one with his own brother.

"_Why __does__ this __have__ to be forbidden? Why __is__ my desire so strong? I love him so much!"_ Masato thought feeling a sharp twinge in his chest.

Looking away, Ren waited for a cold reply like always, however his brother remained quiet. Curious, the blond looked at him and saw slightly flushed cheeks. His heart quickened by the sudden surprise and he thought _"Oh fuck… So cute! Wait… Why is he __blushing__? Usually he is cold toward me…"_Ren's light blue eyes widened with the sudden realization _"I never touched __him__ directly on his skin. I mean, I did it when I was a kid but after __we grew up__, I never touched him in the same way. But, wait! What if his reaction wasn't because of my touch? No! It has to be that!"_

Without any more hesitation, Ren decided to risk it and see if Masato's reaction was due to his previous soft touch. If in fact his slight pink cheeks were that way because of that, then maybe the blond had a chance with his brother. Maybe the fact of them being brothers didn't matter for Masato as for him. Ah! That would be what Ren wanted the most in all world. Nothing else mattered, only his brother and his feelings for him.

The blond closed the distance between them by embracing his brother. With that sudden action Masato froze, but inside his body melted feeling his brother's tempting warmth against his own. When he realized what he was doing, his hands were already tracing every the slight ups and downs of Ren's muscles. Even with his pajama shirt, Masato could feel and imagine how perfect his brother's body was. He wanted to stop. He had to stop, but how? How when the person he desired the most was so close. He just couldn't resist to all the temptation.

Ren was surprised with the sudden reaction from Masato. He wanted to discover his brother's feelings, however he didn't expect to be touched by his thin and long pale fingers. He could feel Masato's desire through his fingers. His brother wanted to feel him, just like he wanted to do with him. Ren couldn't wait any longer, so he wrapped Masato's slender but firm waist with his arms and quickly but softly pushed him against the white door of one of the house's rooms, trapping his brother's body with his own. Nobody was in the home at that time. Their father was at work, their mother had plans with her friends and today was the day off for the maids and the butler. It was just the two of them, better than this was impossible.

The blond moved his mouth until reached one of Masato's ears and whispered begging "Please Nii-san, tell me that you feel the same as me. Tell me that your heart is fiercely pounding just like mine. Look..." Ren grabbed Masato's right hand, held it to his chest and looking him in the eyes resumed his speech "… can you feel it, Nii-san? You're the cause of my strong heartbeat, you're the cause of my body's vibrations."

Masato's body started to shake uncontrollably. This last touch, and intense glance was too much for him. At this moment he felt unable to escape. Ren's tender gestures, deep voice and strong glance was trapping him like a bird locked in a cage.

"Don't… Please don't say those things. We can't..." The blue haired teen said avoiding his brother's light blue eyes.

"Why? Why we can't? Just because of our blood relationship? I don't care about that! We are both men, then what is the problem?" Ren asked raising his voice and Masato startled. The blond took a deep breath seeing his scared expression and his voice softened again. "Please Masa-niisan, can't you see how we belong to each other? Can't you see how your body reacts when I'm close to you?"

"N-No… T-That's not… true." Masato said clenching his eyes shut and trying to distract his lost mind.

"It is true." Ren said determined, yet his older brother didn't show any type of reaction. The blond felt a sharp pain in his heart with Masato's cold attitude. Why did his brother always have to be so stubborn?

"Okay, very well." Ren released his brother's body and continued looking at him in a disheartened way "If you don't want to admit it, then I will not admit it too."

"R-Ren what are…" Masato began to say, however Ren once again resumed talking "From now on we will be only what you want us to be. We will be brothers, Masa-niisan." Saying that, Ren left Masato behind, leaning against the white door and astonished with his younger brother's words.

After walking through some long corridors, Ren arrived to his room and quickly entered locking the door. Even if nobody was in home he didn't want to risk being caught doing what he needed the most by his sweet brother at that moment. Once the door was locked, he walked toward his large bed lying down and taking off his checkered pajama pants with his black boxers. Feeling more free, he slowly started to caress his hard erection up and down while whispering Masato's name. He still could feel his brother's soft skin on his hands, and his tempting sweet scent was still inside his nose. He wished that Masato was the one who was caressing his erected hot member right now.

"That's - nnh - just - mmm - impo-ssible…" Ren said panting due to the pleasure. However, he didn't feel complete. Inside of him, next him right now something missed. The only one that could fill that space in Ren's life was his older brother, Hijirikawa Jinguji Masato.

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**So, what do you think? I hope you enjoyed I'm afraid because of the theme, but well I'll continue hehe ^^**

**See you next week ;3**

**Chuu***


	2. Chapter - II

**Hey everybody =')**

**Here it is the second chapter and maybe it is a bit confusing, but in the end I have a note to all of you. So please read it, because it's important to understand my story ^^**

**I want to thank you for reading this (':**

**Chapter beta'ed by my dear Scarlotte O'Hara ='D**

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**Chapter ~ II**

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Masato and Otoya were both at Masato's house doing homework for school. Until a few minutes ago the theme of their conversation had been about philosophy. However, the subject quickly changed when the red haired male decided to break the silence.

"Masa-chan, are you in love with someone?" Otoya asked without facing his friend. He could feel his cheeks get hotter as time was passing and Masato didn't answer him. The redhead teen ventured to look at him and was awarded with his friend's terrified expression.

"W-Why are you asking me this, Otoya-kun?" Masato asked feeling breathless. His heart was pounding as if it could explode at any time. His body was sweating and he was afraid at the sudden question.

"Because… I think I'm in love." The redhead said hesitantly.

"A-Are you? Who is it?" Masato was shocked before such announcement. His friend on the other hand, laughed nervously and the blue haired man noticed his cheeks becoming redder than before. Then he realized, his friend was also afraid at the question.

Otoya looked to his friend again and in a low voice said "T-Tokiya… I'm in love with Tokiya." He took a deep breath and added "Ah, finally I said it! Masa-chan…" The red haired teen grabbed his hands and begged him "Please, don't tell this to anyone. I…"

"It's okay, I will not tell it. It's a secret." Masato said smiling gently, though inside of his head he had a question that made him feel unsettled.

"What is it, Masa-chan?" Otoya asked, feeling curious about his friend's unease.

"N-Nothing. Don't worry." Masato said.

"Masa-chan, do you think I would not notice it? Jeez, you are one of my best friends of course I would notice that you have something to say. Please, tell me." Otoya begged. He was truly worried for Masato, but he was also afraid. What if his friend hated him because he was in love with a man? And worse than that, he already had told him it was Tokiya who was also Masato's friend. The redhead didn't want to regret confessing his feeling, but he was starting to regret telling Masato because of his odd reaction. "I-I apologize in advance for what I'm going to ask, but… Isn't Ichinose in love with your sister?" The blue haired man asked.

Otoya startled with the question and smiling nervously, said "Ha-Haruka? W-Well, yes I-I think so. But, she's not interested in him." Actually, the redhead didn't know. He only wanted to believe that, so he could feel a little hopeful about the person he loved.

Masato was looking at him with concern. Even if his friend was smiling he knew very well that his heart was crying. Being in love was something beautiful, yet sometimes, it could be really hard. Although, unlike Otoya, Masato couldn't be so hopeful. No, he shouldn't. In his case, he shouldn't love so fervently. He shouldn't desire so wildly. He shouldn't lose his mind so desperately. Because the person who drove his whole being to craziness was his younger brother. Ren was the sin that consumed his entire soul. While Otoya could go and tell Ichinose how much he loved him, Masato couldn't go and tell Ren how much he loved him. How much his heart suffered with all the repressed feelings and desire he had. They couldn't be together. Never. Yes, Hijirikawa Masato was jealous of his poor friend Otoya Ittoki, because he could be hopeful and maybe conquer the love of his life and he… Well, he couldn't. Otoya had advantage and he wanted to steal it.

"Masa-chan?" Otoya called to his friend who was completely lost in his thoughts.

The blue haired male startled at the voice of his friend and said "N-Nothing. Let's continue please."

"M-Masa-chan, do you hate me now?" Otoya asked crestfallen.

"W-Why are you asking me that, Otoya-kun?" Masato asked. His blue eyes widened in surprise with the sudden question.

"Because I'm in love with another man, besides he is also your friend…" Otoya said, his red eyes held an intense sad glow.

"_Really, I'm an idiot for being jealous of him"_ Masato thought smiling gently, then he said "Don't be stupid Otoya-kun, I like you as you are. I don't care if you are gay or straight or bi or whatever you want, you are my friend and I love you. About Ichinose, if I can I will help you."

"Masa-chan!" Otoya shouted hugging his friend tightly. This time, his smile was pure and gentle. Definitely Masato would do everything he could to make his best friend smile like that more.

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"Hijirikawa-sama, your father is calling you." Sebastian, the old butler said respectfully. Sebastian had short grey hair, a mustache and was tall. He was 62 years old, however he was a gentle old butler. Masato seen him as a second father, and almost as a first father because his true father was someone rude lacking feelings of love. Well, he didn't need that. Sebastian always gave him all the love that a father could give to his child.

The blue haired man sighed in annoyance and asked "What does he want?"

"He didn't tell me, however he told me it was important." Sebastian said.

"Very well. Thank you, Sebastian." Masato said smiling gently.

"It's my obligation to obey." The old man said also smiling.

"Please don't say that again. You know that you're much more than a simple butler." Masato said with concern and tenderness.

The old man approached the teen and gently, caressed his soft blue hair saying "I know, Masato-sama."

The blue haired man smiled one more time before the gentle touch, and let himself get lost in all the tenderness that his old butler had to give to him. Sebastian's hands were large and warm and gave him a sensation of security and protection. How he wished he had been Sebastian's son. _"Only that way we could be together."_ He thought without being aware of it. However, once he noticed how selfish he was, quickly shook his head to erase all the forbidden thoughts.

"Thank you Sebastian. Now it's better if I go, or my father will get crazy." Masato said.

"Yes, Hijirikawa-sama." Sebastian said leaving the teen.

Masato left his large comfortable room and headed to his father's office inside the enormous house. He walked through a long corridor that shone with glamour and luxury. On each one of the large and double windows was a long thin curtain of silk. All the soft tissue had light colors like beige and white. The doors of all rooms were white, made of wood and had gold doorknobs. Each one of the doors had a small plaque that said to who or for what that room was. The floor was parquet, made of the best cherry wood. In each corner of the long corridor there were hung countless paintings and an antique sconce.

Everything was perfect. Too perfect in Masato's opinion. The only reason for why Masato and his younger brother Ren accepted so much luxury was because of their gentle aunt. She was the one who decorated every inch of that house. Jinguji Yumi was her name, she was their dead mother's younger sister; and they were both very similar. The long golden hair, the soft pale skin, the light blue eyes... In truth, whenever Masato or Ren saw her an immense urge of cry bloomed inside of them. It was painful. Even after so many years of suffering it was still hard to surpass such great pain. Nevertheless, someone existed who never suffered from _true _mother's death. Their father. He never cried for his loss. Actually he didn't care, the business and the status of their family and name was always the most important thing to him. Something ridiculous to Masato and his younger brother Ren. If only their _true_ mother was alive, everything would be different. Since their father married that woman, who they were forced to call _mother_ as if she was a replacement for their gentle mother, he had become cold. Well, truth be told Hijirikawa Jinguji Masaomi, whose name now was Hijirikawa Miyamoto Masaomi, had always be cold. However, after the marriage with Miyamoto Akiyo he became even worse. And their mother's presence… Jinguji Renge's presence had been completely forgotten, as if she had never existed before. She had been erased out of their lives. Yet, she remained in their hearts and memories, because nobody could erase her from there.

The blue haired male was now finally in front of a large door. He knocked on the wood material and heard his father's rough voice giving him permission to step inside.

He opened the door and was able to only see the back of a luxurious black chair. Then he asked "Did you call me, father?" His voice was cold but respectful.

The luxurious black chair turned around revealing Masato's father. He was a blue haired man with dark blue eyes and a rough expression on his face. Masato didn't like to admit it, but he and his father were similar. Meanwhile Ren was similar to their mother. How frustrating.

"Yes," Masaomi began with a harsh tone "Seiichiro-kun will be back to Japan next week, so prepare his room and some things that he can enjoy." He said, then turned the black chair around once more and added "That's all, you can go." As always a cold tone. So cold that made his own son shiver in pain.

"Very well." Saying this, the blue haired teen left his father's office. He was still amazed by the previous announcement. Seiichirou… Hijirikawa Jinguji Seiichirou was the oldest brother. He had gone on a business trip to Portugal to convince a famous children's entertainment company there to join the families' company in Japan. After two long months abroad, Seiichiro was back. Seiichiro was someone very strict just like their father. However, sometimes it seemed that he cared about all the important people around him. So, in some ways, he was different from Masaomi. Seiichiro loved him, he knew he did, but Ren was special to him and he never had hidden that fact. Well, that was fine with Masato.

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"_Fuck! That fucking girl was annoying. What the hell was her problem? Shit! I think I was clear when I said that it was sex not love… Tsk"_ Ren thought while opening the large white front door of his enormous house. He was upset. Furious. He always had said that what he wanted was sex to forget his problems, not love. Only one person could provide him love and consume his whole soul. Girls were just like alcohol. He knew that he was being a jerk, yet he couldn't care less. Everybody had their problems, even the girls that always opened their legs to him, so he was also helping them to forget right? _"Nonsense."_

Ren was now in front of the large staircase of the house when heard a loud noise that came from the kitchen. Scared, he ran as fast as he could, and once he arrived to the kitchen he was surprised with the view. The kitchen was enormous and had three large stands made of wood. One at the center that had a automatic cooker, a dishwasher and some kitchen utensils hanging in one of the white cabinets; the other two stands were in front of that one and had a few pots with ingredients and some cookies. Each one of the two stands had a row of white cabinets that had dishes on the inside.

On top of one of the stands of the kitchen fidgeting in a few white cabinets and muttering a few words that nobody could understand, stood his older brother Masato. He was curious and surprised. In all his 17 years old he never had seen his older brother on top of the kitchen's stands. Then, he decided to kill his curiosity.

"Oye, what the hell are you doing?" Ren asked, genuinely the blue haired man startled at his brother's voice and the glass in his hands fell to the floor breaking into countless pieces. He peered over the white cabinet, but became unbalanced falling from the stand. Yet, before he could fall on the floor, Ren ran toward him and was able to take him into his arms. Both were shaking uncontrollably due to the tremendous fright they just felt. Ren was squeezing Masato's body tightly. If his older brother had fallen, he probably would have broken his head on the center stand.

"What the fuck were you doing idiot?!" Ren asked shouting. His eyes were shut and his voice was trembling.

Masato had his head supported on his brother's chest and his dark blue eyes were wide in fright and shock. If Ren hadn't saved him…

"I… I was…" He only could stutter. His voice was stuck on his throat.

"Fuck, Masato! Be careful dammit!" Ren whispered softly into his brother's ear. He was so, so scared. He believed that for a whole second his heart had stopped beating.

"I'm… sorry…" Masato whimpered hiding his face. Ren said nothing, he only placed a soft warm kiss on his brother's head, feeling the softness and sweetness of his bright blue hair. Somehow, Masato was now more calm. His brother's gentle gestures had given him a pleasurable tranquil sensation. Ren was always so warm, so sweet, so unique. He had the ability to make Masato feel safe. Special. He wished that time would stop and he could stay in his brother's arms forever. But that was something impossible. Because they had the same blood. They were family. They were brothers. It was wrong being in love with Ren. It was wrong feeling the urge to be one with his brother and tell him _I love you_. Everything was wrong. _Wrong. Wrong. So wrong!_

"I-I'm okay now." Masato said pushing Ren away. Then he supported his hands on the floor, trying to rise, when he cut his middle finger on a piece of glass.

"Oye, oye be careful." Ren said sighing. "Give me your hand."

"N-No, I'm fine." Masato said rising from his brother's lap.

"Shit, give me your hand for God's sake Masato!" Ren said grabbing his brother's wrist. Then he was able to see the small cut. _"If this blood wasn't the same as mine."_ He thought as he looked at the small drop of bright red blood. The only mark that prevented them from loving each other with all their beings. Ren wanted… If he could, he wanted to erase that mark and that way they could stay together. However, while that blood existed they were forbidden to love. Impulsively, and as if he wanted to erase it himself, Ren leaned his mouth down to his brother's middle finger and licked the red liquid drop. The blood dissolved with his warm tongue. Somehow, his brother's blood was sweet and addictive. Probably because of their sin. How ironic, he was feeling such sensations while sucking the same blood that ran through his veins.

Masato was shocked looking at his younger brother. His hot wet tongue over his pale thin finger was providing him an addictive heat. Masato shuddered with the intimate contact. His heart was wildly beating with desire. His cheeks were slightly flushed and his mouth was starting to emit unstoppable gasps of pleasure. When he noticed, Ren already had his whole middle finger inside his mouth. Ren's tongue was moving around his finger. Sucking. Licking. Biting. Providing different reactions in his older brother. Their bodies were reacting to all the lustful pleasure. Slowly, very slowly they were coming toward each other, decreasing their previous distance. They were totally lost. They couldn't think about anything. Only feel. Feel their strong heartbeats connecting each other, feel the heat of their bodies increasing in harmony and feel desire quickly growing and calling each other.

Their mouths were now inches away from one another. They were able to feel the heavy breath of the other. Their blue eyes were half open and had an intense glow full of desire… Lust… Passion… Second by second, their mouths were approaching each other, almost touching… No, lightly brushing each other… However, Masato pushed his younger brother away and left him alone and astonished in the enormous kitchen.

"Fuck!" Ren shouted furiously. His heart was beating fiercely. He clutched his chest as he felt a stab of pain in his heart.

On the other hand, the blue haired male had ran and ran, and when he felt more calm he stopped and leaned his body against one of the white doors in one of the long corridors of the house. His body was shaking uncontrollably and he could still feel the wetness of his brother's tongue on his thin finger. He looked attentively at it, and raised it to his mouth inserting it there and doing the same that his brother did. Sucking. Licking. Biting. He could feel Ren's taste mixed with his. It was so good, so unique, so vicious… Yet, it was wrong and coming back to his reason, Masato began to cry hoping that all his tears could take away his strong passion toward his younger brother.

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**Okay, now clarifying things…**

**So, before starting write this fic for the first time I had to read all the information about each character and their personalities, favorite things etc etc etc… Yeah, it is true I never had read about them x3 sorry~~… And I only read them because I really like this fic (and this is something very surprising because usually I don't like my stories so much hehehe ^^'') ~~ going on…**

**1º about their names - Hijirikawa Jinguji Ren/Masato/Masaomi right? I have to tell you that I don't like these names, they're odd xD but I thought a lot and I couldn't cut any name so I just joined them.**

**2º In the information's I read about their (Ren&Masa) relatives, Masa's mom didn't has name, and with Ren's father happened the same. So, I just thought 'well, it will be Ma's papa and Re's mama' so it was ^^. Jinguji Seiichirou and Hijirikawa Mai are part of the family too.**

**3º Thanks to Doki-chan I find a new and important point to clarify (*hugs you Doki-chan*). It is true that Ma-chan is younger in 'reality' BUT in my fic he has to be the older one for future developments.**

**4º Nanami Haruka and Otoya Ittoki are real brothers. (in my fic of course) She will have an important role, just like all the other characters. In truth I only put them this way because they both have red hair xD. Yeah I know, it's a stupid excuse but it happened x3.**

**Well, it's all and enough.**

**Hope you enjoyed and I apologize for the long note.**

**Till next week**

**Chuu***


	3. Chapter - III

**Hey everybody :D**

**I'm so sorry for the slow update, but I was inspired to write LS (Love is Screwed) so I just 'ignored' this fic a bit x3**

**By the way, from now on it will be like this: 1 week "Bonds" and the next "Love is Screwed"… What means that this week I will not update LS, but next week I will ^-^ just be patient till there**

**Chap beta'ed by Scarlotte O'Hara :')**

**PS:. I think I was too dramatic, forgive me but it had to be this way ~~**

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**Chapter ~ III**

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"Seiichirou-nii-san welcome home. Do you want me to take your bags into your room? It's cleaned already." Masato said, a small smile on his lips. He was happy that his older brother had returned home, he had missed him, however he was tired. He had been cleaning every corner of the house that he knew Seiichirou loved the most. Even if he wanted to be lazy and do nothing he couldn't , since his father had been the one who had asked him to clean the house instead of the maids. He just had to obey.

"It's okay, I will take them." Seiichirou said, with a small smile on his lips. Masato supposed that he was also tired from the long trip, however he noticed the concerned look his older brother was giving him. He quickly found out the reason for such a look.

"Where is Ren? I have something to give him." Of course, the concerned look in his blue eyes behind his black glasses had to be for their younger brother. Ren was the special child in everyone's eyes inside the house. Who was Masato to complain about such a thing? He was nobody since he was the one who saw Ren in the most special and forbidden way ever. He was the one who desired his younger brother, he was the one who loved him with all his heart… with all his being and soul. Why him? Why these strong feelings toward his own brother? It could be anyone, he didn't mind if it was a man even, but why Ren? Whenever he saw his brother a deep and intense feeling started to seize his heart spreading to his whole body. He just wanted to pull Ren somewhere else and kiss him fiercely yet gently, showing him all his strong passion with his wet warm tongue caressing his brother's. His flavor being mixed with his brother's. His body temperature increasing every passing second with each soft, gentle and addictive tangle of tongues.

"Masato-kun…?" Seiichirou called him once he got no answer from his younger brother. Hearing his brother's voice, Masato recovered his senses and stood skeptically looking at him. What was he thinking seconds ago? Why was he losing his mind fantasizing about his younger brother's kisses and touches when their older brother was right before him? When they were… family?

"I'm sorry nii-san… I got d-distracted." He started with a tight and painful lump in his throat. He quickly looked away once his dark blue orbs met his brother's light blue ones. He was feeling guilty, and that guilt was killing him very slowly.

"I believe that Ren is in his room, but for now try to rest awhile before seeing him, you look like you really need it." Although what he was saying was true, he had a additional reason hidden behind those words. Fantasizing with Ren had made his body react, and the fact of being in front of their older brother only made him feel hotter. However, Seiichirou's worried expression and following words only made him feel like a miserable nuisance in his family's life.

The tall older man approached his brother, and touched his shoulder lightly. The blue haired male was able to feel love and concern in his brother's gesture, something that he didn't expect to feel so intensely from Seiichirou. He knew the man loved him, however he didn't know it was this much. It felt good being loved like this from someone in his family, yet his guilt only grew stronger than ever. His guilt only made him want to disappear from everyone's lives. He wasn't worthy of all Seiichirou's love. Even more than Seiichirou, he wasn't worthy of Ren's love. Not only them… He wasn't worthy of anyone's love.

"You too Masato-kun… You should think a little more about yourself and forget about others. Don't force yourself more than you should, because people who love you will get worried about you. Knowing as I know you, you will not let anyone else enter in your own world. So please, think about yourself and try to show your true smile like you've shown before." With these shocking true words Seiichirou smiled warmly, giving a unique and painful feeling to his younger brother. He didn't know what to say or think, he just wanted to cry right then and there, but he couldn't. Nobody could see him in such a fragile state.

"Then I'm going to rest, later I will see Ren." _Ren_… Only hearing his name made his body vibrate in ecstasy. Made his heart fiercely pound, and his desire grew more impatient. His horny member was already pulsating inside his dark blue pants due to all his fantasies from before, and now only hearing his brother's name reminded him of those forbidden yet passionate feelings. Seiichirou grabbed his two big bags and before he disappeared from the long corridor, the blue haired teen said in a low yet audible voice

"Thank you so much for all your support, Seiichirou-nii-san." The older man's eyes widened in surprise, he wasn't expecting such deep and true words from Masato. Although the blue haired male was direct, he was also stubborn and too cold to show his true feelings or say his true thoughts. However here he was hearing them from his brother's mouth. Even if he wanted to look back and see Masato, he knew he shouldn't because his brother wasn't ready to be faced yet. Instead he simply smiled and left his younger brother alone in the corridor. To him, his two younger brothers and sister were the most important people in his life. He would protect them, mainly Masato. From all his brothers the blue haired male was the one who seemed to be the stronger, when in fact he was the most fragile. Seiichirou knew that Masato thought Ren was the brother he loved the most, yet that was not true. He loved them all in the same way, he just hoped Masato could understand that one day.

The blue haired teen remained quiet while seeing his older brother's back disappear around a corner of the long corridor. For the first time in his life he felt touched and happy at Seiichirou's words. Nevertheless he knew that if his older brother discovered everything, he would hate him; he would feel disgusted with him. In truth Masato didn't know what was the worst… Being hated by all the people he loved the most, or being in love with his own younger brother.

"_I have to go… Even if this is wrong, nobody knows"_ Masato thought climbing the long staircase ready to go to his room. He was a hateful and disgusting person. He knew it very well. While his older brother and Ren were resting in their respective rooms, he was anxious to reach his own room not to rest but to lose his mind in all the lustful thoughts, feelings and fantasies about his younger brother.

He was already seeing the white door of his room, and his body was impatiently begging him to be released from all the lust that made his intense desire pulsate wildly and passionately. Nevertheless what made him feel desperate was knowing that Ren's room was in front of his. The one he loved and desired to feel the most was behind that white cold door. Just a bit… He wanted to feel his brother's presence just a bit, and he believed that if he walked towards that white cold door and leaned against it he could in fact feel him. Before he started walking, he had to take a deep breath and swallow hard. He was feeling nervous. Anxious. Desperately aroused. The first two steps were so slow and short it looked as if he had not walked, however his heart was painfully pounding with intense love inside his chest and when he realized his legs were moving on their own; forcing him to walk toward the so much wanted door. Trying to resist was useless and he knew it, so he just ignored the real world around him and obeyed to his strong and forbidden passion.

Once he reached the white door he hesitated for a few brief moments to touch it. Somehow his reason was trying to prevent him sinning even more than he had already sinned. Oh but his desire was so much stronger… So intense, that his lustful body moved itself. His feelings were controlling him like nothing else had controlled him. His inner voice was already screaming his brother's name, over and over again. His two trembling arms were already stretched toward the door, so his ten fingertips were touching the cold structure lightly yet strongly. Yet his body heat was dissipating through all the cold that tried to pass through his pale skin. Very slowly his body was being leaned against the door, his forehead was already touching it and his heart pounded stronger than before. He stopped again. His reason was trying to prevent him from continuing. However he ignored it and leaned his body against the white and forbidden door. Doing that he had goose bumps and he could feel a strong moan wanting to leave his throat, so he had to bite his lower lip to control it. Ren was behind that door and he could feel his presence so acutely. He even could hear a deep breath. Was Ren sleeping? Was he just trying to relax? What was he doing? Masato wanted so much to step inside that room… Yet he couldn't. At least he had to control this desire. He had been coming towards this room only to feel his younger brother's presence. No more, no less. He had been able to do so, and now? What was he going to do now? He wanted to stroke his erection up and down, up and down, up and down… slowly and frantically. He wanted to groan his brother's name over and over again until he felt breathless with such intense passion. He wanted to feel his body reaching his climax, to expel all that desire out, and waiting then for a new stronger and more intense desire to be born. But what could he do? At the same time he didn't want to leave this white door. He didn't want to stop feeling his brother's presence. What would his father and older brother do if they discovered what was he doing right now? About who he was thinking about in the most lustful way right now.

"Ren…" He whispered softly leaning his body even more against the room's door. He leaned into it so much, that he realized he was moaning lightly when he felt his erection rubbing the door. He was so hard that it was painful. Yet, he had to quickly stop thinking about all his desire when he heard his younger brother's voice coming from the inside of the room.

"Nii-san is that you?"

The blue haired male startled hearing Ren's voice. What would he do now? He could hear Ren's bed creaking, he had probably risen from it and was now coming toward the door. Masato had to go, he had to run away from there. His feet didn't want to obey to him, yet he had to go… He had to go… He had heard the doorknob of Ren's room already and he wasn't able to move. He had to continue trying. In one way or another he had to leave that place. It was only a few steps to his room, so he would do it. He squeezed his dark blue eyes tightly and tried with all his might to move his feet. It was hard and he could sense that the door was almost open.

"_Shit…! Move Masato… Move! Move!"_ When he realized his feet were already taking him to his own room, and once he could close the door behind him he heard Ren's door completely open. Thinking that seconds ago he had been in danger of being caught was extremely terrifying. He couldn't let his brother know how strong his love toward him was. It was bad enough to let him know how he already felt, but more than this was impossible.

Once he opened the door, Ren could see his older brother's room's door being closed. In the beginning he was confused. What could Masato have wanted from him? Whenever he knew Ren was home he always avoided him. He never left his room until dinnertime. So he approached Masato's room and was ready to knock on the door when his older brother's shocking words prevented him.

"I prefer to die to love him!"

Ren's heart stopped for a split second. Those words hurt him in the most painful way possible. However, what was hurting him more than such words was knowing that his own feelings were hurting the person he loved above all the others. He knew that lately he had been pressing his feelings on his brother, but he couldn't take it anymore. The older he grew the stronger his feelings become. Yet, if those feelings were hurting him so much he would stop. He really would stop.

"What can I do to make him hate me?" He asked to himself, entering again on his room promising to himself that Masato's tears from now would be the last.

* * *

**You see? Too dramatic and angsty T^T BUT don't worry, it will be better… don't know when but it will *thumbs up* **

**So… See you in two weeks? Hahaha ~~**

**I would like to thank to those who reviewed and followed this fic. I thought people would not be interested because of the theme. But I'm glad you are U_U thank you! So please keep them coming, reviews, follows and favs are my treasures and I want to be rich *O* (xD)**

**Chuu***


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